How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
