I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
