yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Is that strawberry winking at me??
tell me about the fingering
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