I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
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