butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
