girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
