i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize