I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
