i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
either way he was missing a nipple.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
