At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
