i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
