I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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