why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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