So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
