8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
