I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
