I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
