Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
