1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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