he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
