Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Dignity is for republicans.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
