Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
