Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
