her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
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