these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
She said her name was "party"
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
