your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
