he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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