i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
