Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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