My girlfriend figured out who you are.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
