so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Randomize
