It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
She made me pour olive oil on her.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
