It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
then he tried to convert me to islam
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I think people are normalizing furries
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
