is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
