Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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