I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Even my vagina gasped.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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