on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Don't tell me you're on acid again
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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