Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
