Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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