so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
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