Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
