Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
