I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
