My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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