but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
