Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i need an iv and a liver transplant
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
