I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
17 year olds will be the death of me.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
