I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Randomize