Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
