People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
